I am in amazement of how our minds work...
Why do I say this...well, because at certain times in my life, I associated a song with those precise moments. I love how your mind can transport you to a different time and place. To allow you to relive these moments, to feel the pain and joy or to allow you to retrieve memories you never knew you had.
Like the song that played at your brother's rosary...
Window with a View by Carolyn Dawn Johnson...
How it allows me to remember the sounds and smells of that Tuesday morning walking down the stairs at high school...
How everything floods back as if I were there again!!!
How it felt to walk back into school on that same day and feel completely alone...
My heart aches for the girl I was...the girl that couldn't sit at home and mourn but had to go back to school in order to not lose her mind...the girl that had to sing at the funeral cause no else deserved the right to...just being that girl...
Now that I think back on that week...I don't remember seeing a single true friend of mine being there...Don't get me wrong there were friends, but they were closer to my sister than me...And of course there were friends that were older than me that I went to church with...However, not even my best friend at the time was there for me...or the girl I had spent so much of my senior year with...
Looking back I am proud of myself for not losing control...I had lost my lil brother and I picked myself up and moved on...
I had my moments and I have some decisions that I am not proud of...But I moved on...
I miss you lil bro...and I hope you have finally found the peace and happiness you deserve...
Colby Taylor
Feb. 8, 1998 - April 16, 2002
Review Tour: The Fall Affair by Vi Keeland
6 days ago
1 comments:
I am so sorry that I wasnt there for you in your time of need. We have been through some hard times that I am not at all proud of but in the end I know that I can count on you for no matter what. You have always been there for me and knowing that I wasnt there for you on that day and let alone in that time in your life breaks my heart to peices. You alone gave me strength when I needed it most going through all the tragedy that I went through and the heartache and I couldnt even be there for you. And for this I am so sorry. During this time in our lives you and I both know that we pushed each other away. The thing about it is that you needed me and no matter what the circumstances between us I should have been there for you. PERIOD!
All I can and really know what to do is to say that I am sorry and to ask you to forgive me. I love you! More than you know!
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